Caught myself roaming the conservative side of my personality one afternoon – confronting the effects of rigorous toilet training is fascinating! The strangest thoughts began to overwhelm me but they were somehow alluring, intoxicating in a distinctively pathological way, so I let them flow – can YOU hear the sound of one jackboot marching?

Answering to no one has its appeal, legalising torture, re-drawing Europe’s borders, plundering other nations at will – flouting LAW and order, home and abroad -- defying everyone! Fuck you! I’m a genuine superhero, who is gonna stop me? All my political desires fulfilled, my perverse wet dream is your nightmare!

But I can’t do it all alone, I get by with a little help from my war mongering, psychopathic friends -- the more blood the better, fuck peace, give war a chance!

Not content to ruin other nations and destabilise Europe, I turn my attention toward home and target the local economy; printing money like toilet paper rolls is fun!

Lucky for me it was all just a flight of fancy, a pathological anomaly of the mind, a taste of the ‘dark side!’

The prospect of even a fraction of my dark imaginings becoming reality fills me with dread – what a thorough catastrophe it would be!